sweet victory

we won against Man Utd by 2-0!

however, we lost to Arsenal by 2-1 in Carling Cup and we also lost our place in the Champion's League.

well, it doesn't really matter to me. as long as Man Utd does not get any trophy this year, i'll be more than happy then.

still clueless...

sometimes i dunno what i actually feel about this matter

sometimes i feel that i just need to open up my heart and accept this.

but there are times that i feel i should stop pretending and face the truth.

well, maybe i am still not ready.

so, should i stop staring at the sun?

or should i keep on trying to adapt to it?

God, i need you to prove to me that i am WRONG. dead WRONG.

life of a medical student

this will be my last few days of anaesthesiology and ophthalmology. honestly, im quite sad to leave the blocks. Though i have to admit, anaesth does give me headache and boredom, but in the end, i manage to get the glimpse of a role of anaesthesiologist in the medical field. however, this does not really motivate me to be one. somehow, i am always lost in anaesth class. it's either that i get sleepy easily or perhaps the lecturer itself is enough to sedate me deeply. other reason that can be my excuse is that i do not find any useful books around to help me with the revision.

on the brighter side of the block, i think i am now more interested to be an ophthalmologist. most of the cases can be quite straight forward and this field requires you to be handy and good with instruments; it's my kinda thing. furthermore, who in this world does not care bout the vision? take a look around, and im sure almost 1 in 5 women are actually contact lens wearer and having eyesight problem. in addition to that, the number of diabetic and hypertensive patients are also on the rise. im sure ophthalmologist can be quite of a demand in the future.

well anyway, im supposed to be studying tonight. my case presentation is tomorrow and this will be followed by physical examination. somehow, i do not really have a good feeling on that latter part. history wise, it has been known that OSCE and Hanani do not really blend in well with each other. i am also pressurised with the fact that i do not want to disappoint the lecturer whom i think has quite a high hope on me. BLEARGH.

i guess i should stop now. it's already 9.45pm. i need to prepare for my case very well and perhaps practising physical examination on my Homer. =)

WISH ME LUCK PEOPLE!!

the natural crown

i have a medium length hair. being a half-chinese, i am blessed to be born with this smooth and straight hair. to date, i consider my hair as a "virgin" since i have never done any procedures onto it other than to cut and wash.

all this while, i have always been letting my hair down. sometimes i am kinda bored of always looking the same throughout the years. come on, im still young and hence, i should be extremely creative with my hair. with the length and texture of my hair, im sure some people would die to get theirs as mine.

one of the reasons of why i dont really try is that, i dont really know how to. i do not inherit beauty tips from my mom since she is an extremely simple person. her usual advice would be to let it as it is. back then, she used to scare me off by mentioning the bad effects of either dying or perming my hair. hence, i was a bit turned off in the end to try it.

another thing is that, my hairfall is quite a problem to begin with. im scared that the more styling products or chemicals being introduced to my scalp, hence the problem will worsen. in addition to that, i also have quite a wide forehead. im not sure whether i will turn out to look good with the hairdo.

finally, i do not think i am born with the talent of playing around with your hair. i know some girls of my age can do many interesting and stylish hair up do. but to me, i am not sure whether i can do it on my own. i know there are many you-tube videos demonstrating the steps for each hairdo. but sometimes, what bugs me is that i do not have some of the accessories used by them. but when i do, they often get spoilt easily. to date i think i have snapped about 4 hair chopsticks and lost many of the hairclips.

well. i need to start performing before i finally decide to cover up with tudung. im not sure when, but i know, eventually i will. Insyaallah.

don't let me down again...

it's already week 3 of the posting and that means i have only 1 week more to end it. indirectly, this means that i will be facing the end of posting exam as well! bleargh. revision revision. here we go again.

since im currently shining well in the ophthalmology posting, im afraid that last year's incident might be happening again. during my last surgery posting, i was very much considered as a very good student. i managed to answer most of the questions bombed by Dr Ahmed. unfortunately, i flunked out in my OSCE examination. it was the most horrifying exams ever. my answers were like shitholes, pushing myself deeper into the ground each time i uttered words out. by the end of the session, Dr Ahmed had this very disappointing look upon his face after seeing how horrible my performance was. BLEARGH BLEARGH.
looking on the brighter side, he told me that i did way way better in my theory written test. (he did mention that fact to me!) but nevertheless, i was very disappointed with myself. it was like giving a false hope to the others and only to find out that you failed miserably to impress them..

so this time i do not want to let the lecturers down. so far, i think im in a good position. i participated well in the class. lecturers know my name and i kinda asked quite a lot of questions in class. (im sorry groupies! :p) the ultimate thing for me now is to PRACTISE AND PRACTISE a gazzilion times for the OSCE. i must appear confident with my answers as well as with my techniques.

i want to prove to the other lecturers that i am just simply not like the rest. I have a unique personality and i can be a good student despite being different than the others. oh God, please help me out. i need a lot of your guidance.

YOU CAN DO IT!!

180 degrees turn...

i used to love Sundays.

but now, I LOATHE it.

my sleeping pill

currently, im in the specialty posting and hence, will be spending my 1st 1 month with ANAESTHESIOLOGY and OPHTHALMOLOGY.

to date, im enjoying ophthalmology more than that of anaest. I do not understand why but reading it manages to make me go drowsy and sleepy faster than the action of propofol. Why Nani?!?! please change your attititude. God has given you with the 2nd chance to shine in the clinical years. The lecturers are kinda fresh and new and hence, use it to the max!

oh well, maybe i need a new study group or at least a study partner. Being alone or isolated from the entire group does have its toll. But i guess it's my sacrifice for my other side of me as well.

Till then, please stay awake in class and do not be sedated by the revision!

I can't bloody move!

Yesterday as of 3rd October 2009, a futsal competition was held. It was an intervarsity competition for Kosmo Futsal Competition. Groups that won will be representing the uni for the intravarsity competition.

I received the phone call 2 days prior to the match. We only managed to secure 8 players out of 10 from our own 2006 batch. I tried to ask from other batches to join in but some of them had plans or revision plan for the upcomings exams.

So, we only managed to practise once as a team though i didnt attend it since i had already plan earlier on. Nevertheless i was quite worried since it has been a real long time that we had not trained or played together.

Then, the day came and i discovered there were 5 teams in total and we were the most senior players amongst them all. Our team is called "Super Hey" (blame it to the other girls! i didnt come up with that! hahaha". anyway, Seeing on how young and energetic the other teams were, surge of nervousness struck in.

Nevertheless, we managed to win all 2 preliminary rounds.

1st game - 1-0 (Nani scored)
2nd game - 2-1 (Nani scored)

Then we were chosen to be in the next semi final group and we won by 3 something. i cant remember but all i know is that i scored another 2 goals in this match and another one by my powerful defender, Amal.

So, that makes 5 GOALS in total!

Surprisingly, we met out juniors in the grand finale. all of them had trained by either one of us so, it was more of a teacher vs student team. But hey hey, though we were all rusty and old, we managed to win by 2-0! unfortunately, i didnt score any in this match. this always happened to me though; scoring a lot in the prefinals but not in the grand final. in the end, we won a hamper which will be used for the batch open house and also..... yeah, u guessed it rite, MONEY!! RM300 for the champion! :p

but anyway, i was totally satisfied with the matches. 5 goals in total! even the referees were impressed and not forgetting the male audiences. hahaha prior to that, i only targeted to score at least 1 goal but God loved me and he rewarded me with another 4.

it kinda felt overwhelming to hear people shouting for my name. i know, im an attention grabber, wearing my arsenal shirt bearing my name on the back. im recognizable. hahaha

so, that night i was sleeping like a log and only woke up the next afternoon to find out that my whole body was aching like shit! i felt like an 80 year old granny with 5kg of weight on my shoulders and thighs. OUCH!!! i ended up most of the time in bed since i felt extremely tired.

well, it doesnt really matter cause all the pain is worth it! it's true, NO PAIN, NO GAIN but in my case, NO PAIN and hence, NO GOALS!!

PS : heard that the intravarsity Kosmo would be held next weekend. I DONT THINK IM READY!