one that can't be erased...

they said u will grow with time. some think that u learn more with time. i personally believe that the longer u stay here on this earth, thus the more experience that you will gain. alongside with it, you will have countless amount of memories and thoughts. at times, you really wish them to be erased forever from your cerebrum. perhaps they are the ones that have the greatest impact to your life.

however, of course as a human being, we are not born with memory card slots. we can't simply choose to delete some events in the life. this is partly because some of them help to build the characters that we are of today. these events also teach us to be more wary and cautious of the future. they remind us of our mistakes so that they are not repeated in the near future.

i like the saying that we learn from mistakes. but how much of these mistakes should we allow to make? will we ever learn from them? who should correct us? how can we make sure these mistakes are worth the pain?

as a future doctor, i am supposed to be a risk taker. i should be daring enough to make decision on my own as well as helping the others to come out with one. as an only 21-year old medical student, i am not sure whether i have developed such trait. what's even worrying is the fact that i will be dealing with patients' lives. will i be responsible enough?

personally, all these questions are the real ignitions for me to do medicine. i choose this course because i want to challenge myself as well as exploring the limits to my capabilities. i still notice my flaws all around but im hoping i can change before it's too late.

if improvements are not witnessed soon, then perhaps i should change my profession to those involving non-living things.

now, how inhumane can that be?